Born: 2.2.61

First, have a look at this photo, taken a moment ago:

I inflict this picture on you because earlier this evening I was carded when I ordered a beer with dinner. If you actually think that I look like I could be under 21, then let me say thank you, you silly idiot.

I don’t blame the waiter. He’s been trained to be terrified of the slightest risk of accidentally selling the Devil Rum to a minor (who’s old enough to both vote and wander through Iraq without proper body armor, but that’s beside the point), and this being North Carolina, it almost seems at times like Prohibition is still in effect. No, I blame the Liquor Nazis. I used to be a waiter and bartender, so I know the drill. They’re probably instructed to card everybody who looks like they may be a day under 121.

No, I don’t look remotely like I could be underaged. If you’re carding me, it means you’re under the influence of Temperance Unionistas. So here’s my thinking. If I get carded – ever – the entirety of the alcohol control board and/or the local law enforcement authorities responsible for setting and enforcing anti-drinking policies should be marched out behind the ABC store on Country Club Rd. and nard-stomped.

Fascist bitches…



5 thoughts on “Born: 2.2.61

  1. Re: And here I was thinking you where a teenage hotty.
    I imagine it would irk me even more if I had accidentally set off an IED and lost my legs in the process and then been denied a beer.

  2. Re:Denied a beer
    A friend of mine (sirpaulsbuddy knows him, too) was actually charged with drinking underage. The bartender was also charged for selling it to him. This was because my friend had the gall to go into a bar and order a drink after returning from Viet Nam. The bartender knew he was just in from ‘Nam so he didn’t card him. A fight broke out (not related to my friend) and when the cop’s got there, they busted him. San Diego, 1972.

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