by Dr. Sidicious Bonesparkle
The New York Yankees earned some well-deserved criticism in the off-season when they spent a bazillion dollars on CC Sabathia, AJ Burnett and Mark Teixeira and then started charging admission at the new Taj Mahal Yankee Stadium that was so exorbitant that Donald Trump couldn’t afford a seat in the lower deck. Such excess, it was felt, was inappropriate during times of extreme financial hardship such as those the nation is enduring right now.
Well, move over Hank Steinbrenner. Just a few days ago Spanish futbol superpower Real Madrid ponied up a £59M transfer fee to pry Brazilian midfielder Kaka loose from AC Milan. If you don’t have your currency calculator handy, that’s roughly $94M US. And to be clear, that figure does not include salary. That’s just Milan’s take on the deal. The good news is that Kaka’s weekly earnings probably won’t come to more than the GDP of a mid-sized European country.
Wow. That’s a record that was bound to stand for a very long time three days. Today it’s been announced that those same bottomless-pocketed Los Blancos have reached an agreement to purchase Portuguese midfielder Cristiano Ronaldo from Manchester United for £80M – or $131.6M. Again, that doesn’t include salary and benefits, which include hot and cold running hookers and unlimited use of the club’s gold-plated jet.
Last we heard Real was still on the trail of Valencia’s David Villa, too, but he’d be a comparative bargain with a price tag in the $50M range. However, if they’re unable to land Villa, Madrid president Florentino Perez says the club plans to buy the Czech Republic.
Hey, wonder if they need a large auto manufacturer?